On getting old and "sot in my ways"

As I approach my next birthday (only a few days away), I have a few random thoughts (a dangerous thing, I know).

First of all, I wish folks'd quit urging me to get a colonoscopy. I hate the thought of having one of those and even dread that horribly ugly word. So it just might be that I'll get through this old life without undergoing such a dreadful procedure. Maybe.

Secondly, I keep hearing about the virtues of getting a pedicure and a manicure.

Thanks, but no thanks.

I am really getting near the end of my life (but hopefully not) and no one has ever said anything about my fingernails or toenails.

I keep waiting for this:

"Hey Larry, you're a good guy, but what's wrong with your toes?"

Or:

"Larry, what about getting a nail job?"

Thirdly, and this completes my rant for today, what's the big deal with the breakaway of the UK from the European Union?

What does it really mean, if anything, for me and my two dogs.

Bark, bark!

Get this story about the UK off the radar, national news media. Get on with something more interesting. Something more compelling for the average American with two dogs.

Ruf! Ruf!